Kellie's Castle Prt. 2

This is the way to the guard house and the horse stable. See the orange colour thing? Hahaha...














I hope you can see what it is written there. It's a tunnel. People throw coins inside. Umm...I do not understand why they did that.









Not sure what is this hut for. No description also...






This is the river i mentioned before.











This is the wine cellar where they're planning to keep their wine. This room is very cooling. The room next to this is a bar.










There are a lot of holes like this on the wall. I like it so i took a picture of it. During those time, they did not have fan so all this holes are very important!












Not sure what is this called already! He planned to view the scenery from here. It's really high... very scary oh when we were standing u there!











This is another view.














I like this picture very much. It's not easy to take with the camera of my phone... i gotta squat very near to the ground then only manage to take this part of the building.






















simply...


















Yea, i like trees! I enjoy looking at trees with very nice shape? Do we describe it that way?








Well, i guess this is the end of this castle thing... Boring huh?!

Kellie's Castle

Here are some pictures about my New Year trip. Yes, your did not see it wrongly. I went to Kellie's Castle with Kok Ming. Hahaha... I knew many people felt that there are nothing. But i enjoyed the trip very much. I think it because I was with Kok Ming and we love buildings. That was our first time there. What a shame if we who are from Perak have not been to that place, right?

This is a tree with a bear on the trunk. It really looks like a grizzly bear.












We started from the ground floor. I took this picture from across the river.













This is the original house which this person called Kellie Smith stayed with his family. Did i get his name right? I hope so...











Kok Ming started taking photos. I purposely took this picture. haha..i just want to get him involve :p










see, He is taking another picture...













Is this picture nice?












He is walking. I do not think he knew that i was taking a picture of him. Maybe when he sees this he'll scold me :p










Simply...the "roof" of that yellow house.











Itchy hands! $*#*.@ %* it!











Another itchy hands!!!! Haiz...












I gotta go now. To be continued ya!

What are you Thinking?

I wonder what is in his mind. I wonder what kind of a person am I to him? I really wonder a lot of things. I couldn't find an answer. I'm having a lot of fears. I need to seek God again.

Alvin and the Chipmunks

Yeah, I finally brought Wan keen for this show! She enjoyed it very much and we( Wan Sian and I) enjoyed it too. The singing was just too "cun". I forgot that I always watched this during my childhood. I love Simon the most though Alvin is the main character. He is cute with his nerdy specs. I hope to watch it again, yes, again!


Check this out.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2dnrosVyamY


Here are some of the pictures


This is Theodore, he enjoys food. Yian, sounds like you lar :p













After drinking coffee, they became hyperactive! Hahaha...










They got their first Christmas presents!










Theodore always had nightmares...
















When they danced.
















I guess we are like the chipmunks. We look for satisfaction from the world. We hate rules being set, we misunderstand others, we want what we think is good, when we do not get it, we may think that it's not fair, this person doesn't love us enough etc.. Complains after complains.

I received an SMS before, it says,
" In life, God does not give you the people you want. Instead, He gives you the people you need to teach you, to hurt you and to love you. So that you'll be exactly how you should be!"



And in Romans 12:2, it says,
" Do not copy the behaviors and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will know what God wants you to do, and you will know how good and pleasing and perfect his will really is.



God's plan is really good. The process is tough...and painful! I think i'm in the process. However, i felt like giving up! It's a waste if i give up now. i know...

Pride?

I really do not think that a person with low self- esteem is due to PRIDE! I really do not think so. Maybe there are some facts...But we need to see case to case. Not everyone with low self- esteem is because of PRIDE.

Aunt Cindy said," No. A person with no self-worth, no self- value and no self- esteem is due to inferiority complex. Pride is not the right word."

What say you?

One Way

Intro: gm# / gm# / f# / f# / e / e /
B
I lay my life down at your feet
Gm#
You're the only one I need
F# e
I turn to you and you were always there
B
In trouble time is you I seek
Gm#
I put you first thats all i'll need
F# e
I humble all I am, all to you

B
You are always always there
Gm#
Every how and everywhere
F# e
Your grace abounds so deeply within me
B
You will never ever change
Gm#
Yesterday today the same
F# e
Forever'til forever meets no end

B f# gm# e
One way Jesus, you're the only one that I could live for
B f# gm# a gm#/ e / gm#/ e
One way,Jesus,you're the only that I could live for

B f#
You are the way the truth and the life
Gm# e gm#
We live by faith and not by sight, for you
F# e (end b)
We're living all for you




*Aunt Maria said I have a good name. She said God gave me this name for a purpose. Except Shan, they all call me One Way! Hahaha...yeah, I'm quite proud of my name. The first people who gave me this name was Clarence and Vincent they all. That happened when we were still with the OA team.

Haha...Vincent always sang this song in the center. He influenced my sister as well. That day after work, once my sister got down from the car, she sang it. *crazy* =P

He is in my Mind, I'll never Forget !

This morning after the first 2 songs, uncle Jerry, for the first time after 6 years in church, he came up to give thanks to the Lord for the blessings that he had received. Hmmm...He prayed for his wife, his children and he said "not forgetting Alan". Yeah, I've been thinking of him lately. Every year I'll think of him, some how.

People maybe wondering how i got to know him. Yeah, definitely not from church. I was not a Christian yet. We got to know each other through a Chinese Society Gathering. He was one of the members or one of the committee members, I'm not really sure. It was held at his school. Hmm... I still remember they sang a Chinese song for us, as in the guests. After some games, they started the Autograph thing. That was the most frightening session for me. WHY? I know it's stupid but i was really frightened. It was a bit dramatic as well. READ ON>>>

I was surrounded by guys, many, many guys. I went with friends and they left me alone i am not sure why (during the autograph session), maybe they were busy writing autographs. The guys wanted my names and contact. However, i did not give 'coz i was lazy to write. I just penned down my name and wishes.

After that i remember, there was another guy came to me for the same thing. I do not know how i left with him my contact number and address. May be he specifically asked for it. And... that was Alan Tan Kien Leong!

I still remember Chinese New Year was around the corner, I was helping my mum to get things done. And at 12 midnight sharp, my house phone rang. I was very young then. People always frightened me with all the ghost stories. That was why i did not dare to answer the call. So i asked my mum to answer it. AND...who knows...

IT WAS FOR ME!

I was puzzled! With the frown, i really wondered who would call me at this hour. It was 00:00 sharp!

It was Alan! I'm not sure of the reason he called me. All I knew was we became friends. On and off he will call me after that first call. BUT, there was a few months he did not call me which i felt some thing was not right. I tried calling him b'coz i was worried. Then, i got to know he was in Australia. After he came back, he called me. AND THAT WAS THE LAST CALL.

I read from newspaper that this guy met with an accident, died on the spot. I saw his photo. But i was not very sure if it was him because we met once only. That time i started my part time job. And Celine was from his church. She mentioned to me about his death. I did not know it was him. After the second day i finally confirmed, it was HIM!!! I grieved for some time. I started joining the Sunday School trip to the zoo. Since then, i started going to church.

His death brought me to church indirectly. I'll never forget him. He was the most unique friend of mine!!! yeah, uncle Jerry, I'm sure he is very joyful in heaven now! I'm sure!!! We will see him there, sure we will!

Is this TRUE about me?

I am....
The Introvert , The Thinker , The Pessimist
( is this true?)

The Melancholy's Emotions
Strengths
* Deep and thoughtfully
* Analytical
* Serious and purposeful
* Genius prone
* Talented and creative
* Artistic or musical
* Philosophical and poetic
* appreciative of beauty
* Sensitive to others
* Self-sacrificing
* Conscientious
* Idealistic

Weaknesses
* Remembers the negatives
* Moody and depressed
* Enjoys being hurt
* Has false humility
* Off in another world
* Low self-image
* Has selective hearing
* Self-centered
* Too introspective
* Guilt feelings
* Persecution complex
* Tends to hypochondria

The Melancholy At Work
Strengths
* Schedule oriented
* Perfectionist, high standards
* Detail conscious
* Persistent and thorough
* Orderly and organized
* Neat and tidy
* Economical
* Sees the problems
* Finds creative solutions
* Needs to finish what he starts
* Likes charts, graphs, figures, lists

Weaknesses
* Not people oriented
* depressed over imperfections
* Chooses difficult work
* Hesitant to start projects
* Spends to much time planning
* Prefers analysis to work
* Self-deprecating
* Hard to please
* Standards often to high
* Deep need for approval


The Melancholy As A Parent
Strengths
* Sets high standards
* Wants everything done right
* Keeps home in good order
* Picks up after children
* Sacrifices own will for others
* Encourages scholarship and talent

Weaknesses
* Puts goals beyond reach
* May discourage children
* May be too meticulous
* Becomes martyr
* Sulks over disagreements
* Puts guilt upon children

The Melancholy As a Friend
Strengths
* Makes friends cautiously
* Content to stay in background
* Avoids causing attention
* Faithful and devoted
* Will listen to complaints
* Can solve other's problems
* Deep concern for other people
* Moved to tears with compassion
* Seeks ideal mate

Weaknesses
* Lives through others
* Insecure socially
* Withdrawn and remote
* critical of others
* Holds back affections
* Dislikes those in opposition
* Suspicious of people
* Antagonistic and vengeful
* Unforgiving
* Full of contradictions
* Skeptical of compliments


Am i what the test says? Hmmm...

The Wedding

This is the newly wed couple. Kok Ming's sister and his new brother- in- law. Hmmm... so...i was the bride's maid.







They are Kok Ming's eldest brother and his girl friend.








They are Kok Ming's second brother and sister- in- law. I admire both of them because they are very appreciative and very humble. They always offer help to the family. They are kind and friendly! Steven boy's parents :)








Here we are. Em..We seldom take photos together. We are a bit "Kayu"!







This is his youngest brother and his girl friend. They are still studying :)








These photos are blur because i took from the photo album. I hope that photographer did give a disk to his parents. Then i can keep it for myself. Hmmm... Each couple of the family were required to take a shot. His dad's request. There are more but i only took a few.





The one on the right is Steven and the one on the left is Karen. Hmmm...They are so cute. The girl is boyish and the boy is girlish. hahaha...i really think so.




Hmmm...i like to take care of baby. That day Steven's mum left him with me. They went to the groom's house so left us at home. I played with him, made him milk and water and changed clothes etc. I really enjoyed it. Wan Keen has grown up, i long time did not have this chance to do this. However, when i thought of bringing up children which will take me 24 years at least, i freak out!

I'm so happy to meet them AGAIN !

We departed 3 years ago. We were coursemates and we were group mates. Today they came to Ipoh to help their home kids to find college. Hmmm...That's why Shan called me. Hahaha...He called to ask for the direction to the airport. Guess he does not know that I always "sesat" even in Ipoh itself. I don't know the exact location. Hahaha...

Huh, this reminded me of the yellow tag saying,"Don't follow me, i'm lost too!" Vincent, you still have not got it for me wor. (j/k)


There were 6 of them. Aunt Maria, Uncle Edmund, Uncle Bala, Shan...and a few home kids, 2 gals and 2 guys. By the way, they are from Kulim and they are the person in charged of Sunshine Home- a home for children with broken families.

I met up with them at Ipoh Parade food court. At first i sat with Aunt Maria, uncle Ed, uncle Bala and his son. However i was shooed off to another table where Shan and another boy were sitting. I chatted with Shan. We asked about each other's life and updating each other. The other guy who was sitting with us was very shy. He looked at me but when i looked back at him he turned away and laughed. When i smiled to him he laughed again. hahaha...He was really cute. So i kept disturbing him. He kept laughing. He is only 17 years old. Next year he will be going to KDU to study.

After chatting for almost 1 hour. They were ready to leave. We parked our car at the same level. Some of them wanted to go wash room so the others waited outside. While i was waiting with them, some of the people at the food court gave me strange stares. I know what they were thinking. They wondered why a Chinese gal was in the Indian group. Oh ya, by the way, they are all Indians. Hahaha...When i visited them in Kulim, I got the same kinda stares 3 years ago. I already used to it. I love their company. I like to be friend with them.

I'm so happy to meet them after 3 years. i want to make a trip there to visit them. They are Christians too. I went to their church last time. A Tamil church, right! I was very outstanding of course, i was the only Chinese there! Was i afraid? Not at all! We are from the same family though our skin colour is different.

Shan is a very committed worker at the Home. He is the driver, the tutor, the counsellor, and the admin stuff. He stays with the teenagers and the kids there. His home is in Sungai Petani. He is only 2 years older than me. He does not really have salary. Hopefully their lives will get better after registered as an NGO. I really admire his commitment and the heart for the work. How many young people will be able to do this?!

They said they are planning a trip to somewhere to have a break next year. Aunt Maria said she will count me in. Yeah, i wanna join their outing! I wanna fellowship with them! Frankly, i love them!

I treasure them..Aunt Maria and uncle Ed are not young anymore. I really pray that they will stay well! I'll keep them in my prayer. I know for sure, Shan will not be able to take it if there's anything happen to them. Pray for Shan's family as well. They still have not found the Lord. Pray that through Shan's testimony, they will come to the Lord.

Guys, see y'all next year!

About selfishness

hmm...I was quite depressed last night. There were many factors. The night before i was quite depressed also. The more people i meet, the more i feel disappointed with myself. Hmmm... Weird>> maybe...

I do not want to talk about that matter now.

When we talk about selfishness, it usually refers to people who only care for themselves. People who are not generous. People who are calculative etc.. However, it's not only those that were mentioned above.

Last time, i thought i'm a very generous and other-centered person.

I do not mind spending on people. I do not mind giving my time to people. I do not mind giving help to people even in the middle of the night. I do not mind really. But all these do not mean that I'm not selfish.

My counselor told me that I'm very selfish because i kept thinking that i cannot do this and that, i cannot accept this and that, i do not want this and that to happen to this or that person, I am not good etc.. I am selfish in short.

I couldn't help but to accept the fact. I need to continue to change my heart and mind. With all the experiences that i had, i can see how God is molding me. With all the tests, I can see that he wants me to love as how he Loves. He wants me to practice it instead of being NATO (No Action, Talk Only). He loved those who persecuted Him, he forgave them and still giving them chance to come back to HIM.

Do not really understand what I'm talking about right? Sigh...It's all about my mind kept playing the tape saying,"I cannnnt do it! I'm useless!"

I know in many ways God is speaking to me. In fact i can hear and I'm shivering over what He may ask me to do. Sigh...

Frankly, i do not want him to speak louder. I'm very afraid to experience that once again! Remember my previous post? God spoke so loud to me. "DON'T QUIT!" Scary oh! I can't forget that! Haiz...

No Gentlemen on Earth?

Oh man, I'm so glad it's a brand new day today. Yesterday was a super bad day for me. I had planned to bring Wankeen for movie yesterday afternoon at 3.20p.m. at TGV. But my car broke down once i reached Jusco. The engine shut down by itself when i reached the hump near the wet market. I was blasted by people's horns. I came down from my car. I tried to push it but I was too weak. I went back in.

Then a Malay man came and yelled at me. He asked me to get down to push my car. He helped. But hey, dude, who is gonna control the steering wheel and the hand brake?! Frankly, i appreciated his help but he was dumb. Sorry to say that. I was already confused. He yelled at me and was trying to show how clever he was. Well, he failed. My car nearly hit the fence.

After that a Chinese guy came. He said my car was still blocking people. So he asked me to push it again. Fine, i'll push! He was standing there sucking his cigarette. "Oh wow, what an excellent job you've done dude!" Again, nobody helped me control the steering wheel and hand brake. My car knocked the trolley which was in front of my car. Sigh...

Where are all the gentlemen? I was really frustrated. Wankeen started making noise because she couldn't go for movie. My car was stuck in the middle. I couldn't leave my car to get help because Wankeen was there. Cars behind keep horning. And came that 2 "smart" guys! What the...!!!

Well, It's good that my car was at the side, not blocking anybody. After 5 minutes, came a guard. He asked for my permission to push my car to another corner. Due to the two "GREAT" experiences just now, i intended to get down from my car to push it again. But he said," Jangan bimbang, tak payah turun!" Then he called another guard to help. My role was to control the steering wheel and my brakes. This made me feel better. It convinced me that there are gentlemen or people with courtesy on earth still.

Kok Ming came after the guards pushed my car to that corner. He was there with us when we were waiting for my dad and the mechanic. We waited for more than an hour. I was so tired and moody. The mechanic checked my car. The Alternator was jammed. They towed my car back to the workshop to repair it. *phew*



This is the Alternator. It cost me RM260. Hmmm...













Now my car is back. It's fine now!

Thank God:
1. This did not happen during the trip to Gua Tempurung.
2. Did not happen at night.
3. Another experience with my car.
4. Another test for my patience.

* * * *

You know what? When i was in Kok Ming's car, the radio was playing a song with the lyrics saying "E'verything's gonna be alright!" Though at that moment it did not really comfort me, still this assured me that when we are in difficulties and in need of God's comfort. God will be there. He will use anything that is nearest to you to speak to you! Just that, Are We Listening?!

There was a verse at my hand yesterday:
Philippians 4:19
And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus.

I was in need of help, i was so worry and i was alone. He was telling me not to worry. He will send help. He DID!!!

Hate Myself !

Last night, we went to uncle William's place to have a so called "Christmas Party" for the youth. Though i'm not a youth anymore, i joined. Hmmm... I was no feeling well. I was having viral fever. I was tired because i did not sleep well. I did not join them in any games. I am really not sociable.

I understand how other people may feel when they asked me to join this and that and i often rejected their invitations. I know because I've my own Sunday School class. I gotta crack my head to help my children to join in some of the games. I understand... I just couldn't help it. I'm really not open. I can talk to people but not when i'm in a group. I'm a quiet observer.

I gotta accept myself. But i felt guilty when i rejected people. I hate myself for not being friendly. I hate myself for not being open. I really do not know how to make it happen. I forced myself very much. You know what's my worry now? I know i should not worry about it. I know I'm thinking too much. But, this is how i'm feeling now.

I wanna play Frisbee. This Saturday, they are gonna play. I hope to join them. I wanna join them. I joined them when they played captain's ball before. I was very disappointed with both myself and the way they played it. I'm afraid they maybe the same again. Sigh...and i'm very afraid that i may cause them to lose the game. See...I'm too free to think about all these nonsense. Sigh... low self- esteem ah!!! Somebody please help boost my esteem up a bit!

Hmmm...tomorrow i planned to go Tesco alone. I was assigned to get brooms and mops for the center. I laughed when i was assigned to do this. I cannot imagine. Wanwai buy brooms and mops wor. I can harly help my mums with house work. Hahaha...

I shall end my day here. So sad. I should seek God now to find my identity again because i'm looking for assurance from human again.

Chirstmas Outreach

Oh man, today i was being teased by many people. They teased me for wearing skirt. *sob* I do wear skirts, why were you guys laughing at me? Hmm...the first person who laughed at me was Chih Yung, then Arthur, then the gals (Sulyn and Yian Yan). Sigh... Arthur said i looked like aunty. Sigh...fine! Vincent also called me aunty! Fine!!! Vincent, i'll remember you ok!!!

Sigh...Christmas Eve, i looked forward for tonight. I was really excited because my family came to church, chih Yung came and Arthur came. Don't know how i became Arthur's mum. hahaha... Frankly, i was like a kid just now..i couldn't help, i must make Arthur feel warmth. That's my job as a host.

Hope he was ok lar just now...

My Day

Today I'm super free. I sent my mum and my sis to the Energy Therapy. Then i went home. After half an hour I went back there to fetch them. I should upload some photos here. It's really funny. This therapy is not magic but it's gonna help you improve your health. They let you do it for free. They have a nutritionist and they sell health products. Their clients are mostly old folks.

I did not join them though my mum has been persuading me to go for it. Sigh... I just do not like this kind of stuff. I prefer exercise. Hmmm...Here are some photos.




This is the place called U.E.S..








This is one of the therapies. Another two i did not manage to catch the pictures. Hmmm...they are suppose to let this little lamp shine on their affected areas. If your leg is having pain, then shine on your leg. If you have headaches frequently, then shine on your head.

After that, i brought my sisters to Ipoh Parade. I was very angry with Wan Keen, because she threw tantrum there. I bought a Doraemon comic for her. When she was throwing tantrum, she threw the book down to ground floor. At first i promised her to bring her to Marybrown, but i canceled the plan because of her misbehavior.

Then, I went to the Optic to get my new specs and contact lenses. It took me so long because this is the first time i got my contact lenses. It's too hard for me lar. I'm not gentle so very hard to handle the soft lenses. I managed to put them into my eyes though. After i got home i started to online and post blog. I planned to upload these photos once i got back from camp. But i was quite busy that few days. Anyways...my elder sister went back to JB again. She will be back during CNY. My parents were not happy though she came back. My sister is too restrained. My parents did not have their freedom.


Sigh...after online i watch that Frisbee movie. Interesting! I was not able to throw the disk well. I claimed that i'm a visual learner. So after watching it i should be able to throw better? Hopefully. I do not know why i learn it for. Maybe just for fun! It's challenging that's why i like it. When i was throwing the disk, all that's on my mind was how to make it spin nicely. Sigh...I'm really poor in sports. NVm...nothing will happen even though i'm not good in sports.

Then i went to my room. I looked through some books that i'd gone through before. I came across this book called Solving th People Puzzle. I did my personalities survey again. I've combination. I'm high 'S' and High 'C'. Well, maybe 10 years down the road i'll change again. Last time i was high 'D' and 'S'. Don't know what i'm talking about? It's ok.

My time passed very slowly today. Sigh...Finished choir practice then it's already a day gone! Man, after next week i got to start working lar! Hope i'll continue to enjoy my last week of holidays! "Vincent, please go play Frisbee! Come on, before you leave ok?"

After he leaves, i do not think i'll have a chance to play again. *sob*

anyway...Arthur i understand!

Some of the photos

Wai kit kena tembak!! People disallowed him to play. He was sad but still noisy when the others were playing.









I asked for a more "gaya" look lar but then...not up to my expectation yet. hahaha...anyway... would i be sued for putting up these photos? hahaha...




























Hey, hello, i Wanna take picture lar! What are you trying to do? Very gaya ke?




Ha...These were the gals who led worship sessions. They were practicing. I really admire them because they dare to lead. No stage fright at all? I really can't. With my sunday school kids i can, funny huh?! It's the focus problem. During Sunday School i've work to do so my focus was on their performance but leading worship, Em...my focus should be on God but some how my self consciousness is very strong. Sigh...





This was what they were doing during their free time in the camp. I'm not so sure. I just know that Kian Aun was crapping along and he was trying to act like a cowboy i think. Hahaha...Started off with the tambourine then turned out to be cowboy show... Well... I'm blur...



Hmm...The camp ran smoothly without major injuries. 6 of them accepted the Lord. Surely the angels are still rejoicing up there! Pray that they will grow stronger in faith. This camp was a good start for me. This camp enabled me to really see how youths behave. This also helped me to learn to go down to their levels.

My purposes in this camp were to accompany my sister, to learn more about youth and to expose myself to this ministry. Though i've not got the whole picture of what youth ministry is all about, i got to expose myself. The rest of the things, i'll just leave it to God. If God really want me to be part of them, surely He will equip me.

The Spring- cleaning...

The space was just enough for one thiner person to walk.

It will last 10 more years after this spring cleaning. Maybe by then we already shifted to another bigger place where 2 centers can join together as one. I'm sure God will bless us a building in future. In His time!




Not much space to walk. I can easily bump into some of these shelves and stockers. Sigh...My sense of balance is not good lar!









See, the hall is so empty and spacious.









Look at the pretend play room. It was so messy. All because things from outside all shifted in to this room. When i think back, please i don't want another spring cleaning. Tired like hell after carrying all the things out again.




Michelle, Celine and Vincent were in the office. They were doing their work. Haha..look at Celine, look how she sit! Oh man!!! Michelle was busy looking for camera. Hahaha...Vincent was busy checking the reports (his nightmare!)





This is Santiago. I'm not sure how to spell his name but i really, really like his name! Hahaha..Our center had our first spring cleaning after so many years. We finally did it. The Vineyard Keepers helped us out. Frankly, they are really, really helpful! When i asked for permission to take picture from brother John, he was looking at the camera. But then John asked him to do his work. haha...

Can a Guy and a Gal be friends?

Em..I believe a guy and a gal can be friends. They can even be good friends. Those who know the line to be drawn will be safe lar. But for those who do not know that it'll be a bit difficult.

Can i draw the line? It's a good question. Most of my closed friends are guys. I pity Kok Ming. I really thank him for trusting me. So i think i know the line. Not that i do not like gals to be my closed friends. It's all because of my past. That's why now I've phobia mixing with gals. They can betray me anytime. And females are complicated. Though i'm one of them, i still can't comprehend this creature. I did not mean that i can comprehend guys. Just that they are less fussy, not that short fused etc.

Hmmm... But many times when i get too closed i'll start clarifying things. I just want to make sure both parties understand and i just want to be frank. I do not like to be trapped in misunderstandings. Just want to make sure everything is clear. I just do not want to lose a friend. I love every one of them and i treasure them very much!

I've gal friends one, Mun Yan is now the closest i guess. Others will be my classmates, course mates...


Cheers...

Gua Tempurung Trip

Em...Today 8 of us made a trip to Gua Tempurung. I was not supposed to drive there at first but last night Vincent smsed me. He told me that Fei Wong met with an accident. So he would not be driving. That's why i was "forced" to drive there with my OLD car. Hmmm...This is the first time i drove so far. Also this is the first time i traveled so far with my car. We started our journey at 9.45a.m.. We reached there at about 10.30a.m..

Why i agreed to drive there was because of many assurances. Last night i thought back, Sunday Kok Ming allowed me to drive back from Tapah to the Gopeng toll. I experienced driving out of town at least. Then, on Tuesday morning, i talked to Kian Aun, i did not know how we talked about the trip. I asked him if my car can travel that far knowing that i was not going to drive. He assured me that there won't be any problem 'coz the road is straight and flat. Then i asked for Kok Ming's opinion again after i got the SMS. He said OK, just do not push the engine too hard. At night, after i received the SMS. I prayed, i asked God whether those were the signs that He gave to prepare me for this trip. I had peace so i agreed.

Off we went. In the cave, we had fun. I love to go through the water. We got all wet once we entered the cave. Then, we went on the dry,sandy land. We felt so dried and sandy. Most of us hope to reach the river part because the sandy part was quite long. There was a "slide" where we need to slide down to the bottom. I felt so excited about it. But it was painful because i wore shorts.

After a while we reach a very steep part where we need to climb up. I enjoyed it though i nearly fell down from there. Luckily got a few guys standing alongside to help the girls or anybody. Our people sang songs while walking on. hahaha...They managed to entertain other people who came from other states. Which is good.

i think most of us slipped. But i heard some of them from our group teased the one who slipped. Em..then that person teased back saying," I saw you slipped also just now!" To me, when we are in the jungle, cave or any places like this, the chances to get slipped is very high no matter how good you are at all this activities. Hmmm... Maybe they felt good or fun to tease. But i saw that person being teased did not feel good which i think that person felt "fishy". But anyway, good thing is they were not short- fused. Hahaha...

Though their Ego was shown during their conversation. I felt funny, when we saw people slipped, we did not ask "Are you ok?" Instead we teased people. Hmm...This is what we call "surplus behavior". Some of us did ask i saw. Very good! Hahaha...

I was very impatient with some of the gals from Penang. Their feet were stuck in the mud. They were in front of us. So we gotta wait for them and the part was quite steep. I hate stopping like that because i my motor planning and sense of balance is not good. So i did say say something like," Move on please. Don't stop here." Another time was ,"Move to your right, Hello!" I know i was bad lar. I did help them also. Sigh...I must tame my tongue.

After the tour. We went to Kampar to have our lunch. Hmmm...the guys ate a lot. When i saw them eat like that i also feel fulled. After lunch we went Gunung Rapat for Cendol. Hahaha...cool huh?!

I like traveling like this. I like driving. I really love driving a lot but not at night. Hmmm... This is my first time traveling with the 7 of them. First time drove that far. But second time to Gua Tempurung.

This is a good start for me because i seldom talk to the youth. This time managed to talk to a few of them which i seldom talk to. Good trip! Good start!

Just want us to remember that how we use our voice and how we communicate with people is very important. A word can actually kill. Either we make friends or we make enemies.

Make Room in Your Hearts, my Friends

This is my swimming partner. We always go swimming together. When my sister was not with me, he was the one who accompanied me. He went to church before. Guess what? He went to Elim Chinese before. The world is just that small. But he still has not accepted the Lord. He knows many bible verses in Chinese.

He is now working in Penang so we did not go swimming together anymore. He just came to my mind. There was once he SMS me. He asked,"How are you?" I remember that time i was having some problem at work. So i just complaint that I wasn't good and telling him i've problem at work. Then he encouraged me with some bible verses you know, asking me to forgive her etc. It amazed me. I think some of the verses impacted him before. I guess he is still reading his Chinese bible.

Hmm..Christmas is coming. He is one of the people in my list that i want to reach out to. I really hope he will be part of God's family. Pray with me. There are 4 of us in our gang. Another one is back from Maldives now. Hopefully i'll be able to invite all of them to my church. Pray with me!

Pity Him

Sigh...today i went swimming with my sisters and mum. My youngest sis has 2 instructors. One of them is the deaf and dumb one. Today, after swimming for quite some time. I decided to get up. So i went to the children's pool to look for my mum and my sister. Her instructor came to wan sian and i. He started communicating with us with his body language. he even wrote the words out on the pool side to show us what he was trying to say.

He was talking about a shop which helps repair goggles. He was trying to tell us the price at different shops even shops in KL. Em...He asked me to give him my goggles. He wanted to show me different prices for different parts. I refused to give him because i understood what he was trying to say. But he still wanted to look for a pair of goggles to show me. So, he took my mum's. Sigh...

After we took bath, my sis, wan keen, was buying ice cream. He was there. He was "chatting" with wan keen. But then i felt that he was hoping for an ice cream from us. I looked at my mum but my mum did not give me any response. So i just paid and went off.

At that moment, i told myself, i must pray for this person. I did not know why i sympathize him. He owns a mouth, but he can't talk no matter how he wishes he could just talk to make us all understand him, he can't! He can't hear, no matter how he wishes to hear what we are talking about, he can't! I just felt that he is in a very difficult situation. He is lonely. He tried to get business, but how many people will trust his ability. Even if they trust his capability, there will be communication problems.

He is really striving hard. He always looked at me, trying to see if i trust him or not. ( My expression problem i guessed). He is still trying to get assurance from me. I did not know why i felt it this way. His eyes told me that. I could be wrong though.

I was just burdened to pray for him. I hope he will be well. Most importantly,i hope he can come to know our Almighty God. Really do not know how to express my feelings. Sigh... hope he will be well!

Pretty Sad

Toady is our last day of work lar. Hmmm... Kinda unwilling to go off. Why? Maybe because i seldom leave them for this long. And this is a year, i do not have to go for any training. During my training, i seldom miss them because i've buddies there. But now i seem to have nothing to do. Hahaha, my world seems not spinning anymore. I need time to readjust my life for these 2 weeks. Also will miss Vincent's presence with us. Haha...

Hmm.. I think i'll have a lot of outdoor activities with friends or my sister. I can't stay at home. I think i will go swimming very often, go hiking maybe and gym. Hmmm...How else can i spend my holidays? Oh ya, i've not finished reading my book. Christmas outreach takes 2 days, being bride's maid takes 1 day. If Vincent is free, we play Frisbee. I think the percentage of "FFK" by him is very high.(means he can't make it most likely). There's a Christmas Party for children on 20th Dec at Elim, then choir practices. hahaha...quite busy also huh?!

I wanna fly a kite, i've never tried flying a kite. Hmmm...not sure if my "impian" can come true.Hopefully...

I planned to go back to center on Monday to complete the Schedule Boards. See how la.. Not sure if my sis will go with me. Sigh...Many plans in my mind now.

A Pretty joyful DAY...but...!

Hmm..Today was a pretty joyful day for me. I'd completed my work. Tomorrow is my last day or i should say, it's OUR last day of work. Then we will have 2- week break. Hahaha... Battle will start again next year!! I don't wanna think about it now. Let me relax for these 14 days!

Hmmm... Today one of my colleagues was like "Bao Qing Tin", her face was as dark as this "Bao Qing Tin". I did not talk to her the whole day. I just don't want to get from her. She did her work and we did our work. We were the noisiest ones. Hahaha... We as in Celine, Vincent, Cheng Fai and me. We were really noisy. We were working on the Theme Wall. Vincent designed the Theme Wall for next year for Canning Garden center. His Masterpiece you know??

Why were we making noise? hahaha...we were crapping as we work. We laughed like mad. But not Vincent. He was a bit cool today. He still crapped though =) They said i laughed non- stop and i influenced Cheng Fai. Hahaha... He became crazy =P I'm not sure about laughter but i noticed my over- exaggerated reactions influenced them. Hahaha... they started screaming when there's anything wrong. muahahaha...this is what tickled me the most.

Then, Cheng Fai started an irrelevant topic, which was, "Humpty Dumpty is not an egg. It's a Canon." Em... I started asking him why is it not an egg? He said because the rhyme did not mention that it's an egg. Then i asked again, why isn't it an egg? He said because it's not an egg. Can you see our craps? But there were more. Please note that when we were discussing about this, Vincent was sitting next to me. There were no other conversations going on.

But guess what. He started criticizing Cheng Fai, he said, how is it related to us whether Humpty Dumpty is an egg or not. And he started asking the question that i asked just now. He asked,"why Humpty is not an egg?" Then i burst out laughing. I foresee that he'll start asking questions that i'd asked. Then everyone burst out laughing again.

There were more craps and fun in the process of putting up the Theme Wall. I just couldn't put them all in words. Just hope that in future, we can have fun when we work also. Not so stressed.

But we seemed to have groups in this small little center. We were always noisy but there's another half of us were very serious and quiet when they work. I don't like it at all because they seemed very serious and NO JOKE kinda persons. very scary. Hmm...Anyway, different people have different ways of working. We just need to accept each other and continue to serve God in our very special ways.

For those who are in low spirit now, Cheer up!
Life is still BEAUTIFUL!!!

Chao...

Forgiven...

Hmmm...Thanks for praying!

Emm...everything is fine now. Monday, i told myself i must forgive. I must look at her when i talk to her to show that i've forgiven her. And i tried. It went on fine. She kept being lectured by my boss during work. But i can't help much and i better don't get myself involve because I've not settled with my own issue.

I realized that she dared not look into my eyes when she talked to me also. I guessed she was guilty over that issue. If she really thinks that she's right, she will not bother to ask me things. She will ask others. After work that day, i received a call from a volunteer, she told me that one of my students' mum passed away. I informed my boss. Then i informed her.

After a few minutes, she called me back asking me to go lunch with her and that volunteer. But i told her i'll decide the next day as i'd promised to go lunch with other colleagues. I told her that i'll let them decide. At the end, we did not have lunch together because the others did not want to join them. Anyway, everything went on well.

Today, i was able to offer her the junkies that i brought to the center and able to talk to her more. Really thank God i've totally forgiven her. I know there will be more problems to come in the future. I must remember this day. God spoke to me and with His strength, i'd overcome it.

The Shout of God

Remember i posted a blog about a movie called "Facing the Giants"? Hmmm.. i watched it another time yesterday. The first time i watched, i was busy taking care of a toddler. So i missed out many parts. Yesterday, i was quite free, i decided to watch again. I sat in front of my TV alone.

The movie went on until this part where Grant Taylor, the Head coach asked the biggest guy in the team to carry a 160 pounds guy on his back, blind folded and crawled with knees off the ground. The fat guy ( i forgot his name) was very tired, he wanted to give up but the coach kept yelling at him," Don't QUIT! You don't QUIT! Give me MORE! Don't QUIT! 20 more, Don't QUIT! 5 more! 2 more!!!" He yelled at him very loudly.

At that moment, I felt that God was yelling at me! Asking me not to QUIT! I couldn't take it. I nearly screamed. Then my tears rolled down from my face. God was speaking through the coach, through that movie! I was all alone in front of the TV. Who else was He talking to but ME?!

I was having that DVD for quite some time. I was reluctant to watch it again as i'm not a person who loves watching TV. I cannot even sit through a movie if i'm watching it at home. So why that day i spent my time watching that? Why was it after the conflict with that colleague?

God was asking me to give Him more, to forgive one another and to persevere. He had overcome the world (John 16:33), so why am I still having the fear? What is impossible with God? All things are possible with God.

Tomorrow is Monday. I hope i will be able to do what God wants me to do. I really hope that i can look at her in her eyes and talk to her like before. I hope that i can greet her when i see her tomorrow morning. Pray with me if you are reading this. It's indeed tough for me. Really in need of your prayers!! Hmmm...

DON'T QUIT!!!

Phew!