The Surprises In Times of Trouble

I can't help but to be touched by this song. Indeed, I had gotten a lot of surprises in times of trouble. Hope that this song will touch you too.

Human = Ostrich

I bet everyone will have a shell of their own. Our shells is always the comfort zone. We tend to be what our past has shaped us. Some people may not have very tragic past but some people encountered a lot of hurts in the past. Because of the past hurts and experienced, some of us learn to break every shell that they created during their storms but some choose to stay in their shell and never come out again.

As for myself, I am not those who would break the shell that I have created. I'm kinda passive. How did I feel when I was staying in my shell? I can testify that it was not any happier. When I learned to break my shell, there were more pain than staying in the shell. But the after effect was I have joy and my life and attitude changed. If you ask me if I wanna go back to the shell that I used to have again, I would say NO. Well, some times when the situation is so terrible that I'm tempted to give up breaking the shell but to stay in there. It is definitely not an easy task to break the shell and step out from our comfort zone.

Some people keep looking back at their past and hoping that others will understand their past thus understand why they are behaving like now. However, our world is a cruel world. Who cares about your past? Well, I guess in the beginning people will try their best to understand and to give in, but we need to grow. If we are not growing, many people will start to feel fed- up and tend to give up being patient and being understanding. All of us need to move forward. People have no time and energy to stay with us in our past.

I also think that we humans are like ostrich. No matter how high or how low our social status is, no matter how well educated and how out- going we are, there are some parts of our life that we do not want to reveal to others. Ostriches bury their heads into the ground when they are afraid. Some of us do too. On the other hand, some of us, run away, change topic or avoid certain people when the topic of conversation goes across their boundary thinking that we can continue to hide what we want to hide. We are like OSTRICH!!! *I giggle when I am typing this* That means, humans are just as dumb. We forgot that when we hide some parts of us, we are revealing the other parts of us. We are created with intelligence and we have the ability to judge things in an acceptable way. No matter how we hide, some people will still be able to detect what we are trying to hide in their own special way. The thing is, whether they wanna tell us they know what we are hiding from or not.

Hmm... I am an ostrich too! What is the solution? I think continue breaking the shell that we form everyday will be it. I cannot think of any better way right now. By overcoming our passed hurts is the crucial thing to do. I think we need to be humble enough to show our weak parts to others. Maybe we should be proud of the weaknesses that we have especially when we have improved from it. No weakness, how to improve? So let's choose now what we wanna be!

Reflection

OMG!!! Tomorrow is the last of the year 2009!!! I am definitely not welcoming it because when the year starts means I have to start working and studying AGAIN!!! I have not had enough of break yet!

Hmm... Looking back, a lot had happened this year. I can proudly say that this year is a fruitful year. The most memorable and enriched event for me this year is the Ministry Trip to Indonesia. I like travelling a lot but I am most joyous if I can see things that a normal trip cannot see. I had never thought that I will stay with ex-lepers in my whole life and acted on stage in a hall full of talented and gifted people. This was the family that I stayed with. They were so hospitable. I wonder how are they now.

Hmm... Besides the Indonesia trip, I couldn't remember what happened in mid- year. Hmm... I think I'm really getting old. Aha! My mum accepted Christ this year. Hopefully next year will be my dad's turn. Then our whole family can attend Sunday service together. However, I felt that I'm stagnant at work. I really hope that I can get the exchange program to Australia to see what is happening on the other end of the world and hoping to learn much from the people there.

Ah! Now i remember what happened in mid- year. I started studying. It was kinda relaxed and I was so happy because of the compliments from the tutors but it became so taxing especially when I had some other things to do in church and work. I studied until I wanted to vomit. But at the same time I experienced grace. Guess what? I did not have much time to study for the examination, thus I can only spot questions. God is so good and gracious, all the questions were what I studied. My tears nearly rolled down from my eyes at the exam hall. I am also grateful to have my sister to accompany me to the exam hall as I was not very familiar with the road. On the way, she helped me revised too. Hehe...

I typed this since 10pm plus. Now is already 12:26 am. I think these are the things that occupied my year. I am really thankful that I have enough for this year. Though there were struggles and distress at work, relationships and other minor hiccups, see I'm still in one piece, safe and sound. :)

I am not quite welcoming the year to come. There will be tonnes of challenges ahead which I am quite afraid of. But I remember what one of my friends had said before. He said that we should not be afraid anymore when we had tasted so much of God's blessings and grace along the way. Thus, I am holding on to this and I'm reminded not to be like the Israelites. I am sure on and off I will be upset because of something and some people but the most important thing to me is the attitude at the end of the day. Hmm... I am hoping that I will continue to grow to be stronger but not "colder". Oh God, please do not let my heart grow cold.