07 November 2008

ABCdefgh.....

Oh man! It's the right time to go on MC. I'm really sick. I felt much better today just lost my voice and my limbs are weak. Sigh...

Yesterday, A started to talk about B. A said B called her and talked bad about many people. One of them was me. A said that she doesn't know how to handle this person. I was a bit mad because I got to know that B intended to dig things from people. Well, that was the impression I got because A painted it to be like that. I got that person's missed calls during noon time as well as evening time. Some how I did not get to answer B's call.

So I smsed my superior and told her that this person had been calling people around and I asked why she called me. Then my superior also felt suspicious but I did ask her not to question her first. Just in case A lied to me I said. So she asked me to call her back and see what B wants. So I called back and she just concerned about me because on Wednesday I was really sick. She intended to replace me if I can't work.

So I told my superior about her intention of calling. Many times I dared not go on MC partly because I can't let go of my work and also because I'm very afraid that after I go back, there will be problems that I need to solve and that will drain me a lot. But last night, I'd decided to rest so here I am blogging. My superior called me just now because some how she got a chance to talk to B. She found out that A did not tell me the truth. A was the one who bad mouthed people around and A was the one who called people. I was like, crap, I was the one who fell into her trap and B was the victim.

Oh goodness! A really couldn't see herself. She really thought that she was not at fault at all. Some more she twisted and repainted the real picture. She told a lot things to B which were not true. I wonder if she did same to the parents. All of us are evils but she is the angel. She even discouraged B to accept Christ but told me that her husband objected. In fact that was the wrong fact. B told us that her husband supported her and he's interested to accept Christ too.
She was the one who was discouraging people to do that. Luckily I told B not to look at human to accept Christ.

I thank God for revealing the truth that we are save from the devil which was trying to break us! God will surely take care of His work. He who started it will complete it.

KL Drift

Lately a friend introduced a movie to me entitled Evolusi KL Drift. Well, I'm interested because of all the drifts. I think my friend too. Yeah, it's a Malay movie which I seldom watch any. Hindu movie could be more than that. Hehe

There's this guy in the movie who offends the gangster and they ended up having a race together. All this happen because of that guy's girl friend. He doesn't believe that his girl friend has changed. His friends around him advise him not to race with he gangster but he refuses to listen. He has his best friend to "pujuk" his girl friend for her. But his friend actually already fall in love for her. But his friend does not take any action to go after the girl but keeps helping them.

He doesn't believe his friend that he disowns his best friend. He wins the race but the gangster is not happy about the result so they kill one of his friends at the car workshop. Every one is sad over that incident but he still doesn't know his problem, he wants to look for the gangster to fight with him. He goes to the disco and finds the gangster there. They dragged him to the backstreet and wants to kill him. Fortunately, his best friend knows about it and rescues him.

Still, he doesn't accept him even after his best friend has saved his life. His best friend doesn't give up. The next day, the girl calls his best friend out. He actually refuses to meet her. But she insists. And when he sees her, he makes things clear to her that he doesn't want to get himself involved in their problems anymore. He even asks her not to call him anymore. Meanwhile, his friend sees them together and he gets angry. He beats his best friend up and he pulls the girl aside and talk. The gangster is drifting his way to their direction intends to kill the guy. His best friend notices that, quickly he pushes them aside and he himself being knocked down by the car. He is sent to the hospital and all his other friends scolds him.

The moral of the story is:
EGO can kill relationships and EGO can kill our beloved ones.
Insecurity can also kill relationships.

Who are we to control other's lives even our spouses lives. Who are we? Even God doesn't force us to obey, He gives us choices, He wants us to obey out of love. He says that He is our friend. Do we respond to a friend not out of love? Do we call somebody friend when we dislike that person at all?

"It is not a question of how much we know, how clever we are, nor even how good; it all depends on the heart's love. External actions are the results of love, the fruits it bears; but the source, the root, is in deep of the heart." -Francois Fenelon

03 November 2008

Confirmed!

Another sad thing happened today. I received a phone call from my cousin. Her son was suspected to have mild Autism. I did not know how to comfort her. I just answered the questions that she asked. I told her the procedures etc then talked to my superior. Sigh... This time really confirmed that it's in the gene.

I'm quite upset because I do not think that I'll be brave enough to have my own children, which I hope to have. I also feel that I should not get married when I can't have children or I'll involve my future husband to the stream of sadness. Sigh...

Oh God, when are these going to stop? What do you want from me? I'm really tired to be sad. I'm tired to face all these again and again! I'm exhausted!