24 February 2010

Let Me Forget About It!

I have a lot of unforgettable fear. When I was young, I used to be "bullied" by CHICKENS! Especially roosters. When some roosters saw me, they would run towards me and fly over me to peck me. *I hate them!* This is what caused me to be SO afraid of two- legged animals.

There was another thing that I won't be able to forget for the rest of my life. It's about CHICKEN again. I remember there was once, my mum tried to kill a chicken. Her skill was bad. After she chopped that chicken's neck, the chicken was still alive. At that time, my mum did not tied its legs up. Thus, it was fleeing with its blood shed all over the kitchen. I was SO terrified.

Lately, my mum killed a few chickens for Chinese New Year. On morning, when I was still sleeping, I heard the "yell" of the chicken and I could hear the sound of the flapping wings. I ignored as I did not know that my mum was killing the chicken. Last Saturday, I had class in the morning, so I had to wake up early. I heard those noise again. After a while the noise was gone so I thought it was the right time for me to go out. When I saw my mum, she was sitting there pulling off the chicken's feathers. I screamed! From that day onwards I dare not walk pass the place where the chickens were killed.

I kept trying to overcome my fear, I kept praying. However, I failed! I was too terrified. My mind kept repeating the sounds of the chickens and it kept on visualizing what I saw that day. Grrrr...!!! A few days later, I felt better. Who knows I saw the feathers that my mum kept. She intended to make something, I don't what is it called, but it's something that people played in the old days. A traditional game. The feather freaked me out. :( My days really passed like hell.

Today, I feel much much better! At least when I walk pass the place where the chickens were killed I no longer have fear. I hope the days to come will be the same. My fear is so real. I can understand the man who vomited even though he had recovered. I guess my memory is too good to remember what I should not. :(



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